It can be low effort, passive-aggressive, insulting or derogatory towards your convictions.

  • ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    57
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    26 days ago

    I received a framed picture of my parents, from my parents. They said it was because I didn’t have a picture of them hung up in my house.

  • Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    48
    ·
    26 days ago

    Oh fuck i have a long history of this…

    My parents got me a cheap set of tools, pliers, screw drivers, level and a wood burner with no wood to burn at 10. My brother got a gameboy SP and Pokémon.

    Two years later I got an electric shaver and Cologne. I didn’t start growing facial hair until 17 and didn’t have enough to need more than one pass with a razor until 26. Still have the Cologne, it’s not awful but it’s also not a smell that works for me.

    14 I got a store made cake and $20. I can’t eat the cake, the frosting makes my face hurt and that’s been a problem since I was 5 so they know I can’t eat the cake.

    Basically, I didn’t get a present for me until I met my wife at 30.

    • Cataphract@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      26 days ago

      damn, that sounds like you were part of a case study in your childhood. Is there a difference with how your brother turned out and yourself? Interested to know if you picked up skills like DIY and stuff while your brother isn’t capable of those things.

      • Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        ·
        26 days ago

        He’s got a far better grasp on career and financial stability but he’s to nervous to do things like drive in the big city or see doctors about mental health. He’s amazing with computers but not great with mechanical things.

        I on the other hand suck with computers and am excellent with mechanical things. I put a lot of effort into self improvement and mental health, but still float around jobs and only have a stable homelife because of my spouse. I’d like to say all the DIY stuff I got growing up helped with that, but most of them were shit quality and the ones that didn’t break got absorbed into my dad’s things anyway. My diy skills come exclusively from living with a moto of “well fine, I’ll just do it myself”

  • Noel_Skum@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    42
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    27 days ago

    My mate’s little sister was sad and bemused one Christmas when their parents bought her a (single) Pom-pom. Why would you not buy a pair?

  • Hellnikko@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    37
    ·
    26 days ago

    I was given 30 quarters that had letters and numbers on each one in a black velvet pouch. If you put them in a certain order, it had a message. The quarters went in year order. The message was a Bible passage according to Matthew. It was when Judas was given 30 silver for betraying Jesus.

    The context, I told one of our friends that the gifter was trying to get with his wife while he was deployed. He denied and then made me feel like shit to insinuate such a thing. Turns out, it was true.

    I still have the quarters so I could give them back some day.

  • EllE@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    37
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    27 days ago

    I once got a picture of a really cool present from my dad, which he said was in the mail. Never got the present.

    • tamal3@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      8
      ·
      edit-2
      26 days ago

      Maybe it got “porch pirated”. I thought I was immune from that until my things started disappearing.

  • Gerudo@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    34
    ·
    26 days ago

    Not me, but my wife.

    She receives an envelope from her grandmother, oh cool, money!
    She opened it and it was empty. Okay, no fuss she probably forgot to fill one when making all of them for the family. A week later, she told her grandma it was empty. Her grandma replied “No! There’s no way it was empty, your mistaken.” This is par for the course. She ignores my wife all the time and talks down to her.

    So an empty envelope is the worst I’ve seen.

  • tpyo@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    30
    ·
    edit-2
    26 days ago

    About 20 years ago

    I went to my family Christmas with my then-partner. I got a Grinch onesie from my family

    We then attended my partner’s family Christmas where basically the entire living room was stuffed with presents for the kids (my partner and their siblings). My then-partner complained about how the siblings all got more $$ worth of presents. I pointed out that I got a pair of pjs for Christmas. The reply: “it’s not about the dollar amount, it’s just they got more than me” (paraphrased)

    I hated that present. A fucking onesie? It was such a disappointing present, and for a long time I used it as an example for questions just like this

    I kept it and wore it. Eventually I lost the bitterness and started to cherish it even. Which is why I still wear it regularly this time of year! It’s quite warm… plus, it has pockets!

    Grinch tax:

  • Suck_on_my_Presence@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    28
    ·
    26 days ago

    I was deployed and got a box from my home unit that was basically just trash. I think it was supposed to be funny, but it was just a lot of scrap paper thrown into a box. Nothing written on them that was for me. Nothing to signal anything. Just a big box of trash that could have been nothing more than the recycling bin upended into it.

    That was pretty heartbreaking.

    • tamal3@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      edit-2
      26 days ago

      Did you ever talk about it with them? Definitely sounds like an inconsiderate joke. Flabbergasting that they managed to follow through enough to get it posted to you.

    • Arality@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      8
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      26 days ago

      This is so funny to me! My wife recently got mad at me for comments I made on our anniversary. When I explained what I meant, she was totally fine. Communication is hard sometimes.

      • Ben Hur Horse Race@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        26 days ago

        Yeah I’d agree with that, but this is different. She was trying to help with what she saw as my ignorance about how much more positively people respond when you follow certain social rules.

        She’s a northern German woman who used to run a car dealership. I listen to punk rock. We get along but the things we value in life are pretty disparate.

      • tetris11@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        26 days ago

        “No honey, I was referring to that female dog… and was saying that you can’t not you’re a c-

  • Truffle@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    26 days ago

    Too small clothes so I’d be excited to go on a diet and lose weight… as an already very sick underweight teen with an eating disorder who wasn’t a wize zero “but you’ll get there”

    Paulo Cohelo’s garbage books to “help me with my constant depression that keeps bringing everyone down and you like books, no?”

    Stuffed animal toy thay was first intended for a baby shower but the mom didn’t want it so “why should it go to waste if you can have it as a birthday present”

    Plastic surgery offering as a sweet sixteen present “so you can feel beautiful”

    Professional acne treatment (Accutane) as a birthday present because “Oh you poor thing need it”

    A used and stained old yellow blouse “because it will make you look happier” I hate yellow.

    And the list goes on lol. That was growing up and it is one of the many reasons why I am no contact with all of those people.

    Now as an independent adult in a stable loving relaionship surrounded by nice genuine friends, I actually get very thoughtful and beautiful gifts. Some expensive, some with no monetary cost.

  • dfi@lemmy.nz
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    edit-2
    26 days ago

    My mom’s boyfriend got me this huge present that just fit under the tree, the gift was pretty heavy. I racked my brain trying to figure out what it was, had no idea. Got to be honest i was a little hyped up to open this thing, even though my opinion of the boyfriend was average

    Christmas day I finally get to find out what it is. open the box and it was a Microwave; a second hand microwave. He had replaced his, wasn’t even a good microwave (5 minutes to boil a cup of water) Mom already had a microwave and i was 14 years old.

  • Schlemmy@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    26 days ago

    Pizza baking sheets. They didn’t fit in my oven.

    A paella pan. I don’t like paella.

    A coffee grinder. It just doesn’t grind coffee beans to the right size.

    A random Italian cookbook. I have a chefs degree. I’m well down with basic Italian cooking.

    See, I cook every day. Twice. And on occasion I love to cook for friends but that also means I’m over poor quality cooking stuff. I’ll buy my own gear. Most people think they do me a favour but I just have useless stuff piling up over the years. I’m grateful to get gifts but last year I just told people right a way that if they want to give me cooking related gifts I would be equally happy with some special sort of salt of some fun ingredients to cook with. Those things don’t last as long but it would make for a much better gift for a food enthousiast.

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      ·
      26 days ago

      same. Don’t buy me electronics. I’m too much of a snob to use what you bought. Either stick to the Christmas wish list we all agreed on, or keep the receipt.

    • BreadOven@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      25 days ago

      Yeah, it gets that way when people know something major you do. The amount of lame chemistry shirts and such is far too high.

      I know they mean well, and I definitely appreciate it. But it does get a bit old.

  • Call me Lenny/Leni@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    26 days ago

    Someone sent me what they referred to as a self-help DVD that was just some motivational speaker type of person invalidating my issues. A virus in the DVD also temporarily destroyed my friend’s DVD player in the process of playing it.

  • stringere@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    17
    ·
    25 days ago

    My birthday is the 27th of December.

    On any given year odds are that my birthday sucked. Growing up it was during holiday break so no bringing cupcakes to school. 2 days after Christmas, care to guess how many kids want to attend a birthday party? Birthday presents were almost always an afterthought combined with Christmas.
    I am a huge Star Wars fan so when Carrie Fisher passed away on December 27th, 2016, that was an especially shitty birthday.
    There have been uears when my parents have forgotten my birthday entirely.

    All that aside, my wife threw me my first and only surprise birthday party for my 40th. It was Star Wars themed including food she made from the Galaxy’s Edge cookbook she had given me for Christmas. That year I got a Kenner power (Gonk) droid still in the original packaging (with Venture price sticker still on it), which my mom had somehow saved since I was a kid. She also gave me all of my old Star Wars action figures she had been saving for me, unknown to me. And I also received an original Rancor and the box it came in from a friend. That one almost made up for all the others before and since. I’ve learned the best way to have a good birthday is to set the lowest of expectations.