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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: July 3rd, 2023

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  • You’ve got to pick a lane. Either follow the rules or don’t. You don’t get to do things differently than expectations on your whim and then get upset when held accountable. I agree with your charge that you took a bunch of breaks earlier and that is your 30. If you want to take a 30, don’t do the other stuff. If you can’t work in those bounds then maybe this isn’t the line of work for you.

    I’m not saying your an asshole, but your expectations and those of your employer don’t align. The conditions you described don’t sound abusive, that’s just the world of working in a hospital. To me it sounds like you need a full career change ASAP, and if that means a pay cut, then you have to decide if your current situation is worse than making less. Anecdotally, I switched jobs and took a pay cut because that was better for me, but that might not be an option for you if funds are too tight.

    If you do think that your being treated unfairly, then follow the rules to the letter to removed all doubt. If you’re not supposed to help on those other tasks, tell them no. I would say that working in your field does generally attract people that are willing to go the extra mile for patients, which can make you look worse comparitively, which is unfair, but life.




  • If you want a house, you have 100k in the bank and could put some of that down as a down payment. Idk where you live or what your housing market is like, but if you could find a smaller place for a reasonable price, you may pay less on a mortgage than on rent, and you’d be building equity.

    When I bought my first house over a decade ago, I think it was under 100k, but wasn’t large. I don’t think I put anything down other than the earnest money. Because I wasn’t at 20% down, I did have to pay for PMI as part of my mortgage, but it was like $50 a month given the cost of our place. I’ve since moved and purchased two house since then, rolling the equity from the previous to the new one. My current mortgage payment is the first time I’m paying more monthly than when I was renting, but houses do have maintenance you have can’t offload on a landlord. I think it’s still significantly cheaper in the long run, but moreso the equity is the biggest upgrade.

    For retirement, it’s definitely good to invest what you have saved, to a degree. You could talk to a financial planner to help you invest within your tolerance level. If you aren’t doing so already and it’s available through work, you should be maxing out your 401k match at the minimum. If you can spare it, it’s better to put more in you 401k than to keep it in savings thanks to compounding interest, and the taxes that aren’t taken. That annual max for 401k is I think more than 20k annually.

    But with all of that, you need to live the life you want to, not the life that others are living. I love having a house and as long as I’m able to, I will never rent again, but I know people that don’t want the responsibility of home ownership, that have no desires to purchase. I don’t have kids because I don’t want them. My wife an I travel and do pretty much what we want when we want, within reason. Kids cost a lot and we have more money because of our choices, and are both very happy with our decision. Point being, you don’t have to live a “normal” life to have a fulfilling and successful life. If you are unsure on things like investing, find an expert to help out. If you want a house, you have the finances to do so. Don’t compare yourself to others in different situations as some barometer of success and adulthood.





  • This is a dumb article. It sounds like they are blaming boomers for having money, then the article basically explains why they have money, and for the most part it’s justified.

    I’m not going to lambast anyone that got a cheap house at a low interest rate, then worked for 50+ years to get to retirement to find out they need more money. It’s not like all of these boomers are sitting on millions, they have hundreds of thousands in retirement, no mortgage, but have fears of medical bills or nursing homes.

    Fuck, I hope someday I approach retirement with enough money to live out the rest of my life in relative comfort. I’m fortunate in that I’m in my mid thirties and have a house (mortgage for now, but at least I’m getting equity). That shouldn’t be held against me like it is to boomers in this article.

    What I won’t defend is boomers that complain about not having enough money when they continually voted for all of this. Statistically, boomers lean right, but I try not to generalize entire demographics like this. There were a couple of quotes I. His article that highlighted some of the worst offenders out there, but I mostly read about people that know that one illness will wipe out their savings, so they keep working until they can’t.

    If I can amass the monies I need to retire early, I’m out ASAP. My company offers a 55/10 plan where if I retire at 55, I can keep my medical coverage until I’m 65 when Medicare kicks in. That’s my current goal, but shit happens, and it can happen to any of us. I just wish that shit happened to the billionaires and not everyone else.



  • We had a rescue rottie that was aggressive when we got him. It took years but through controlled exposure to new people, some professional training, and just working through different situations, we got to the point that I was never concerned about him hurting any guests. Maybe he would body a small child because of his size, but never bite.

    We currently have a personal trainer coming to help with our husky/pit/German shepherd rescue. She’s a great girl and unless you’re a rabbit, would never hurt you, but she’s very reactive on walks and when people walk by with their dogs. It’s helping a bit, but it’s a marathon, not a sprint.

    So my anecdotal advice is to get a private trainer with recommendations and good reviews. Your vet may be able to guide you to someone or perhaps a local shelter or doggy daycare place. My wife volunteers at one of our local shelters and she found someone through networking there who also volunteers her training at said shelter.

    In the interim, keep the dog separated from your daughter. Any way you can associate your daughter as a positive thing for your dog is good. Positive reinforcement is king