You can turn invisible, but only when no one is looking at you. Cameras and animals count!

I still average about 10K steps per day, but if I take it easy and just sit around the house for a few days too long I instantly get punished with a gout attack. Apart from that 500% daily recommended dose of vitamin D seems to be enough to keep this decrepit old husk going

How dare these ungrateful boyars critisize the noble czar!

Does this guy sleep in tupperware containers or something?

He just cut out the middle man, like an efficient government should! /s