“But remember, I’m the only one who took the test. You know, the aptitude test or whatever the hell they call it. I took it— when I did— every time I do a physical— I take a mental test. And I’ve aced it. WHERE’S MY DOCTOR? Is he around, I travel with more doctors than any human. If people get sick in the audience, they don’t— do— they leave him alone. You know what they call him? Collateral damage. If that person right over there, he looks like shit actually. He looks— he looks like he’s ready to have a heart attack. If he actually had a heart attack, you know what they would do? They would leave him alone.” 

The stupid shit thinks he’s been taking an ‘aptitude’ test. He’s not — it’s a brain damage test. And if you’re being asked to take one every time you have a checkup, it’s because your doctor has an excellent reason to suspect you have brain damage.

Don’t you love the way Donny boasts about acing his dementia test, and then careens wildly into the kind of incoherent anecdote that only a dementia sufferer would tell? Way to connect with your audience, you rotting dumbfuck. People can’t afford food. They can’t afford housing. They can’t afford basic goods and services.

Above all, no one can afford healthcare — and this out-of-touch nincompoop is bragging about how he has all the doctors in the world, and you don’t. What in the actual fuck?

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