I may have to work for a childish manager: he is older than me, which should mean he is more mature than me but he acts like a teenager, somebody I would never befriend out of the workplace. I don’t know if he is simply this childish or if this is a facade he’s been told to maintain.
I like to use downtime to learn, because my field is huge and there is so much stuff I barely understand, because learning opens doors to better jobs and because almost half of my coworkers bore me, use every excuse to smoke and if I read at least I don’t have to talk to them.
I don’t like wasting my time.
I worked for this manager, in the past: he had the guts to tell me I have to talk to him, as if I don’t give him the attention he craves for I’m not good enough for him. I told him I am all to talk about the job, the science behind it (science I barely understand), about the devices we use, not about his life, not about what he did on his weekend, not about his problems with his wife.
He didn’t say anything and to this day I don’t know if I pissed him. I neither understand why doing your job is not enough. I’m there for a paycheck and to learn.
Working for this person is a terrible idea, right?
One of my biggest pet peeves is being forced to befriend people I don’t feel attached to. It feels fake and walking on eggshells, like trying to guess what the needy person wants to hear, like he was a child. Why can’t you say hi and get things done?
I’m a team lead. I have an engineering manager above me. He expects my team to be autonomous. He’s involved in quarterly planning, but otherwise I really just reach out to clarify what’s expected of my team.
As for my team. I expect the team members to be autonomous. We sync every other day. We share what we’re working on - not so much for micromanaging but to make sure we reach out for help if we’re stuck instead of wasting time silently. Its also for knowledge-sharing. It makes it easier to pick up Bob’s projects when he suddenly quits without warning. And others can learn to avoid his mistakes.
Currently we’ve got too much work that there’s no downtime for any major learning on the clock. My previous job had subscriptions to online learning platforms and I had quarterly goals to complete at least one.
A couple things in the way you explained yourself lead me to believe you might benefit from improving your soft skills. Not everything in a job is specifically technical. If you work with people, you have to learn how to work with people. You don’t have to enjoy it, but it makes things easier.
Agree, from what you describe, @[email protected], you have trouble reading the situation so you did not give us enough context to understand. Also the fact that you do not know if he is pissed or not also indicate you are able to correctly read the situation. A simple next step is just to talk with him about anything. Could be work related or maybe just ask for change for the metro/taxi/vending machine or anything.
Aside from technical knowledge, people knowledge and communication is also crucial. You may need to work on that to improve. Talking here only in a professional setting, not for your personal life. For that, do whatever you like to do.
Just yesterday, we talked about peo0le having trouble connecting with their coworkers and how we can help them collaborate. Communication at work is a win-win skill.
Counterpoint but managers are cops and don’t talk to cops
Do whatever gives you the growth you want. Ignore the people slowing you down.
